johnentwlstle:

it literally stresses me out how much good music there is that i still haven’t listened to

(Source: pid0ve)

thespacegoat:

• Accidentally close a tab? Ctrl+Shift+T reopens it.
• Bananas release dopamine, eat them when you’re sad.
• CTRL+SHIFT+ESC is the one handed version of CTRL+ALT+DEL
• Don’t brush your teeth hard, it makes them sensitive and removes enamel.
• Don’t like spiders? Put citronella oil on your walls and they will not go there.
• Drink one glass of water for every alcoholic drink you have, you’ll get drunk without getting a hangover.
• Get clear ice cubes by boiling water before freezing it
• Heal paper cuts and immediately stop the pain with chapstick.
• If you accidentally write on your dry erase board with a permanent marker, scribble over it with a dry eraser marker to remove it.
• If your shoes smell, put them in the freezer overnight, it will kill the bacteria. 
• Make bug bites stop itching with a banana peel.
• Make a paper longer with 12-point text, but 14-point periods and commas.
• Need to get around a blocked website at work? Try replacing the http:// with https://
• Never send your resume as a word file (unless asked) Instead, save it to a pdf file, it’s much cleaner and professional looking.
• Pick a flavor of gum you don’t normally chew, and chew it while studying during a test.
• Place a piece of bread in a container with your homemade cookies and  they will stay soft.
• Put a dry towel into a dryer with wet clothes, they will dry faster.
• Put toothpaste on a pimple and it will dry out.
• Practise fake smiling in the mirror every day before going to work/school, you’ll genuinely start to feel happier.
• Rub canola/olive oil on knives before cutting onions, you won’t cry, alternatively chew gum and you won’t either.
• Short on time with a wrinkled dress shirt? Hang it up in the bathroom while showering to steam it flat.
• The night before, place things you don’t want to forget the next morning on top of your shoes.
• Use hydrogen peroxide to remove blood stains from clothing.
• When cleaning windows use newspapers or coffee filters instead of paper towels, they will not leave streaks.
• When microwaving bread products/pizza put a glass of water in with it, it will keep your bread from going spongy.
• When you move into a new place you’re renting, take pictures of any and all damage, then post them on facebook (privately if preferred) so you can use the reference date as proof you didn’t do it.
• When searching plane tickets online delete your cookies prior, prices go up when you visit a site multiple times.

(Source: ygritties)

youknowyourebritishwhen:

strangerwmf:

Look, wherever you live in the world, Britain has probably tried to invade you at some point. That is a historic fact because new research claims that Britain—in our long, colorful, magnificent, slightly-shameful and occasionally cross-dressing history—we have invaded all but TWENTY TWO countries in the world. This new study found out that, at various times, Britain has invaded almost 90% of the countries around the planet. […] It’s not that we failed to invade those other twenty-two, it’s just that we basically forgot.

— John Oliver in The Bugle, about “All the Countries We’ve Ever Invaded and the Few We Never Got Round To”

For the curious, the 22 Britain never got round to are: Andorra, Belarus, Bolivia, Burundi, Central African Republic, Chad, the Republic of Congo, Guatemala, Ivory Coast, Kyrgyzstan, Liechtenstein, Luxembourg, Mali, Marshall Islands, Monaco, Mongolia, Paraguay, Sao Tome and Principe, Sweden, Tajikistan, Uzbekistan and Vatican City. (See map, from the Telegraph, above.)

Generally, these are either land-locked nations/nations with few ports or small nations (that might have gone over-looked). But I’m disappointed about Sweden. It’s right fucking there.

France, meanwhile, holds the record of being invaded by the British the most, which Oliver suggests is because their food smells so good wafting across the Channel.

Places Britain sort of forgot to invade.

imagine having someone who only wanted you and didn’t flirt with anyone else and didn’t make you uncertain whether they liked you or not

(Source: elzhhs)

thewonderlessyears:

thewonderlessyears:

the girl sitting next to me in class is wearing the same shirt as me in a different colour and we keep awkwardly looking at each other like do I say something or just sit here help

i said ‘nice shirt’ and she said ‘better than yours’ i’m done

(Source: brandfckingnew)

(Source: bestgirlystuff)

ziamism:

dear full time supermodel part time boyband member zayn malik,

first of all how dare you

x

(Source: kryptoniall)

daddyfuckedme:

dude we need to stop making fun of teenage white girls and start making fun of teenage white boys like they are literally the worst people in the world and if you don’t agree you’re in denial

p0ndorica:

it really pisses me off how people who are good at maths/science/history/etc are seen as the intelligent ones and will go far in life but also seen as the “boring” ones, but writers and artistic/creative people are seen as the interesting and talented ones but also unintelligent and doomed to be unsuccessful like shit bro how the fuck do any of us win 

frankoceans:

bl-ossomed:

cuntr0lable:

whataboutmikey:

That the kind of eye-rape that gets you from 0 to 60 in 3.2 seconds.

fuck me please.

colton you are so sexy

just imagine him checking you out like that ugh

(Source: luxury1ife)

(Source: bananastands)